"The Watch Song" lyrics - RAY STEVENS

I was sittin' in a bar room just drinking my beer when a cowboy came over and he said loud and clear "you've been seen with my wife now I want your life. we can do it in here or we can do it outside." Well I'm a meek minded fellow that's never been yellow so I stepped outside and kicked him in the crotch. Well it slowed him down but when he came around he stomped on me and then he stomped on my watch.

[Chorus:]
John Cameron Swayze I know this sounds crazy but my wrist watch is busted and I can't understand. A cowboy stomped it flat and I freaked out over that now I feel naked with it gone from my hand

[Recitation:]
Oh, John Cameron, me and that watch had been together 13 years. It's been shot at, dipped in beer, one time I even tied it to my motor boat and drove it up to the beach. People thought I was crazy John Cameron but I knew you'd understand. I've hocked everything I own but I can never hock that watch because it's never let me down. Besides, the pawn shop would never pay me any money for it.

[Resume singing in a ballad style:]
So when that cowboy stomped it flat I freaked out over that. I came up off the ground and I beat him fair and square. But he couldn't take a lickin' and now he's stopped tickin'. And now I am headin' for the electric chair.

[Second Chorus:]
John Cameron Swayze I know this sounds crazy but my wrist watch is busted beyond repair. A cowboy stomped it flat and I freaked out over that and now I am headed to the electric chair.

[Recitation:]
That cowboy's wife came over to see me the other day, John Cameron, and she told me that she and I were just going to ride off into the sunset together. Not only that but she bought me a brand new watch. A bullava. I told her to stick it in her ear!

[Repeat second chorus and fade]